Get it? Running. Because it's a running blog! I slay me.
No updates lately, which never bodes well for training. After a couple of disastrous long runs I've decided not to run the Alexandria half. I was registered and was really looking forward to it but it's not in the cards. D is still just a bit too needy to leave him for 2 hours at a time while I run. Maybe later this year? Maybe next year?
Those are the facts. Here are the feelings. I'm pissed. I'm angry that can't do this. Angry that my life is still so far from what I'd hoped. I had dreamed about qualifying for Boston this year and now I'm wondering when I'll get to run more than 5 miles at a time. I love D so much. He is the light of my life but it is so, so hard to be mommy every second of every day. He loves Nick but after 40 minutes or so he needs me again.
I am complaining. I sound ungrateful for this very wanted baby that we tried so hard for. I am well aware that I am lucky to have this baby at all. But... It is hard. Every day is hard.
Someday running will be a thing for me again. Until then, it's all D, all the time. I'm trying to be 100% ok with that.